i m afraid dawn s song of fears

Sara Bareilles

I m afraid of heights, afraid of tryin
I m afraid I might have been a little stupid to write this song
I m afraid that during high winds
The stop sign will uproot and decapitate me
Or that I might thrive on to Scientology
I m afraid that after I die
Someone will have sex with my dead body
And be like, Not worth it
I m afraid I could raise a son who d get radicalized on Reddit
Or that he ll Back to the Future, and I ll think he s hot
I m afraid that I ll accidentally text a pic of my vagina to my dad
And I m afraid that on Ancestry. com
I might find out I have a bunch of half siblings
And they ll want to be in my life
I m afraid that if I got an awful disease, I wouldn t be brave
I d just be a bitch and be mean or if I needed emergency heart surgery
The doctor would go, Hello nipple hair
Sometimes I m afraid to hold a new baby
What if I lose control of my arms for a second?
And throw it at the ceiling fan or something like that
Can t I trust my arms?
And I m afraid, that under every bus stop is a sinkhole of rats
And I m afraid, they lie about expiration dates and my hummus is just fungus
And afraid that the second I leave town, I ll get a Uti
Why can t they just sell those pills over the counter?
I don t need a doctor
I know exactly what it is
Oh, back to my kid, I have more stuff about him
I only breastfed for four months, is he gonna be a bond trader?
And I m afraid that if I m lucky enough to be 80
I ll be one of those ladies who s entire scalp is visible when the sun shines through her salmon colored hair
And I m afraid that someone will find out that I memorize all the words to Macklemore s Thrift Shop
Or that I bought seven seasons of The Mentalist
And of course, I m afraid that somewhere, deep inside of me, is a lost tampon
Where did you go? Where did you go?
I am afraid