velvetears - again
I'm thinkin bout relapsin again
I can't help it I always give in
I'm scared to fly home I'm scared to die when I land
Cuz I kno my plug will be waitin there with open hands
I wanna change I rly do
But I can't cuz I dont kno who
Who I am
I wanna be somebody
That isn't just a fuckin junkie
But I dont kno how to be anythin besides me
And this is me
This is me
This is all I wanna be
I've never felt so fuckin free
velvetears - dust to roses
Yeah I'm feeling good but what does that even mean
I'm still scared I know that death is waiting for me
I don't feel prepared, I got family praying for me
Cause it's been too long that I've been
on the brink of insanity
I cannot see
The person in the mirror has never been me
But my blood turns the dust into roses
My blood turns the dust into roses
I'm chasing all these dreams they run from me
And I can't keep up but I'm fucking trying
I feel like all I've ever had is me
And I feel like I still don't fuckin know me
velvetears - hands around my neck
I'm lookin at you
Opposite sides
Of our bedroom
Is this the gloom
Now I don't know if anything that you said
Was really true
Now I don't know if I even know you
Do I know you
Do you know me
Is this what it seemed
Were we meant to be
Was this love for free
Or is there a cost for these fucked feelings
You drowned me in
Waters too deep to swim
And I don't blow shit out proportion
But I thought this was something damn important
And I don't wanna be dramatic
But love be like that so I'm tryin not to panic
I could find somebody who could treat me better
So tell me why I stay no matter fucked shit that you say
You got your hands around my neck
I promised last time that next time would be the last
But it all moves too fast
These bruises are tellin me that I'm not shit
Got your hands around my neck
velvetears - high
Baby u been on my mind
Baby ur the reason why I get high
Baby u say that ur tryin
Baby I kno u been lyin
But I don't mind, I can't mind
I know that I hurt u
But baby u hurt me too
So I get high and I can't mind
I will always love u
I will always love these drugs too
So I get high and u don't mind
And u get high and I don't mind
velvetears - i don't know how
I can't stop these dirty habits
I can't stop
Can I stop
I never learn each time I grab it
Another drink
Another pop
And I can't stop these thoughts in my head
Can they stop
Will they stop
I just feel so much death around
All around me
Please just stop
My mama taught me how to fly
My daddy taught how to lie
These drugs taught me that my mind
Isn't as strong as I thought
And I
Gotta slow down
But
I don't know how
I
Gotta slow down
But
I don't know how
I
I wanna slow down but I don't know how
Wanna slow down
But I don't know how
velvetears - mad
Stop fuckin' sayin' that u care
Stop pretendin' like that u was ever there
Bitches mad they wanna pull my hair
I'm the typa bitch to make ur bitch disappear
U don't wanna see me mad
U don't rly wanna make me mad
This isn't a joke I am rly sad
I don't give a fuck bitch pls don't make me mad
I don't need a squad I do it on my own
And I don't need a family bitch I got my own home
I did everything on my fuckin own
And thats the shit that I fuckin own
U will never fuckin know what it's like to live low
Everybody braggin bout some shit that they don't know
Talkin bout sellin like they been on the roads
If you was in the dirt
then u wouldn't be talkin bout shit like u know
velvetears - no reason
I think that I been gettin fucked up for too long
Fucked up for too long
I wanna say sorry to my family
To the people who always helped me
Even though I was living so selfishly
I just wish they could see the things that I have seen
I wanna learn how to not harm me
Cause late at night my thoughts are fuckin haunting
I got this pain so deep inside
It drives me insane but I keeps me alive
I don't see a reason, never had a reason
To keep on breathing, with nothing to believe in
I don't see a reason, I never had a reason
To keep on breathing, with nothing to believe in
I was just a tweaked out kid
Didn't know I'd end up like this
Thought that sadness was just a phase
Now I'm paying to phase out everyday
I ain't never had no direction
Used to look in glass pipes for reflections
Never meant to put yall thru this
I just can't grasp why I fucking exist
I don't see a reason, never had a reason
To keep on breathing, with nothing to believe in
I don't see a reason, I never had a reason
To keep on breathing, with nothing to believe in
velvetears - none
I be chillin' on the west side
I ain't ever goin outside
Feels like my arms are tied
Whoever u pray to is a lie
I been lettin my fam down
Tryna get a grip I can't now
My plug wanna see me in the ground
Nobody make a fuckin sound
I don't trust none of u
I don't even trust myself
I don't feel none of u
I don't even feel myself
I don ever fly first class
U could find me poppin somethin in the back
I be on a flight like everyday
Nothins ever made me wanna stay
And I can't understand this
My thoughts r fuckin outlandish
Yall too worried bout the lavish
Feel like a long time I been crashin
I don't trust none of u
I don't even trust myself
I don't feel none of u
I don't even feel myself
velvetears - seethrough
Brown powder on the table
We're sayin things that we werent able
To say to anyone else
Ya we both got our scars
Had our hearts ripped apart
By everyone else
U kno im no good for u
I'll hurt u thats just what I do
Its not somethin I mean to do
My love is just kinda see through
Can u see through
Can u see through
Tell me what to do and thats what ill try to do
But I think u can see through
Cause I can see through
I see through you
This isn't somethin that we do
I think we both see through
I think we can both see through
velvetears - take it or leave
I know who you want me to be
But I'm not that girl and I will never be
I don't know what you're expecting from me
This is all I am
You can take it or leave
This bottle's not helping
My dreams are all melting
These drugs fucked me up
I hate myself so much
Pour me up a cup take the pain away
Crush that shit up til I can't feel my face
I just wanna go somewhere far away
Fuck my mind
I can't take another day
This bottle's not helping
My dreams are all melting
I guess that I'm just not worth helping
I'm just not worth helping, I wish you'd believe me
I'm just not worth helping, I wish you'd believe me
Tell me why I can't get through to you
I might have to let this go
You're so hard to read I'm miserable
I might have to let this go
I keep dodging problems
By numbing my feelings
I can't keep on going
I wish you'd believe me
Tell me why I can't get through to you
velvetears - will i ever care
I think my feelings are gone forever
I don't think I'll ever get it together
I don't even miss you anymore
I can't find anything worth living for
I can't remember if I ever cared
I can't remember will I ever care
Will I ever care
Can I even care
Break me, break me outta here
Take away all of my fears
Show me, make it fuckin clear
Tell me, tell me why I'm here
Will I ever even care
Can I ever even care
Will I ever even care
Take away my fears
velvetears - where the bottle is
People tripping in my living room (living room)
But I'm layed up here, just me and you (me and you)
Had to throw all of our plants off the balcony
Then you cut my hair and I cried that I feel ugly
I'm trying not to walk into the kitchen
'Cause that's where the bottle is
You'll just share my drink and
I'll feel like there's not a problem here
Making beats in bed while I sing
'Till I drown my thoughts up here
I'll drown my thoughts up here
People tripping in my living room (living room)
But I'm layed up here, just me and you (me and you)
Had to throw all of our plants off the balcony
Then you cut my hair and I cried that I feel ugly
velvetears - go along
I can't stop thinkin bout death
Could give a fuck bout the rest
My mind is my casket
And it won't stop askin
What's goin on?
What's really goin on
I won't just go along
If i don't kno whats goin on
Whats really goin on
& I don't think i'll make it
It's been too long i'm breakin
My souls already taken
My hands they won't stop shakin
What's goin on
What's really goin on
I won't just go along
If i don't kno whats goin on
I can't keep goin on
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